My husband Josh and I have been married 8 years next month and I can remember dating him like it was yesterday. We’d walk to a little restaurant not far from our downtown apartment where we’d sit and talk and laugh, we’d tell stories about our childhood and lives before we met, we’d share pitchers of sangria, and relish in getting to know every detail about the other person. I can still vividly see his eyes while listening to my stories, corners crinkling with a smile, taking it all in. We’d sit on the same side of the booth wanting to be as close as possible, we’d stay up too late, and we’d call “just because”. We bonded so seamlessly, so naturally from the instant we met and although we spent all of our free time together we never grew tired of each other.
Fast forward a year and a half, a condo remodel, a puppy, a wedding, a honeymoon, another 9 months and we welcomed our first born to the world. Our long dates are replaced by couch snuggles with a baby on our chest and a puppy by our side, “just because” calls are replaced with short “we need” calls, and while all the love remains we’re exhausted by parenthood and life =)
A move to a new house, a crazy sweet toddler who is now two, and we welcomed our second baby boy into the world. The couch snuggles grow by one and the rare quiet times are replaced by chaos, and love, and moments, so many moments.
And Josh and I did our best to date where we could and make time for us, probably more so than most. But here’s the thing with time, if you don’t manage it, it manages you and there’s never enough of it in a day, unless you all have the flu and are projectile vomiting, those days never end! But back to us, we were no longer making each other a priority. The kids were our main focus, which works great short term (especially when you’re in newborn survival mode and drowning in feedings and diapers) but it won’t work long term, not if you want to last. You have to make your spouse a priority, your marriage a priority.
You see, it was US before the boys were born and it’ll be US again long after. And when the kids grow and leave the house I still want to know who my husband is, I want to know his likes and dislikes, his dreams and goals, and I want to be on this journey together, with him. And luckily for me, so does he.
So, we’ve decided to date each other, we’ve changed our evening schedule so the kids get into bed a little earlier, which means we can sit down together and bond. We’ve vowed to make time for US and to make US a priority again. So I encourage you to date your spouse, put your phone down, study their face, make out with them, laugh with them, love them, and who knows, you just may remember why you started dating them to begin with =)
Hope you all have a beautiful evening, I’m off to date my husband ❤